Dad’s Guide to Mother’s Day 2012

Dads, take note. Mother’s day is important to those ladies in your life.  If you felt like yesterday didn’t go to plan, take heed of these pointers for next year…

DO Let your lady have a long, luxurious, quiet lie in. She is a mother, therefore she will be very tired. Keep the children away, don’t ask where anything is. Just let her sleep.

DON’T let her get out of bed at 7 because the baby is crying and you’re too busy with a marathon 30 minute session on the bog.

DO prepare her favourite breakfast in bed, or encourage the children to help if they are old enough.  Tea and toast, scrambled eggs, pancakes, waffles, bacon, whatever floats her boat. A fresh flower on the tray would be an excellent touch.

DON’T let her trudge around making the baby porridge, feeding the baby his porridge, then getting covered in said porridge.  Then swearing a bit. Especially not if she’s not had a cup of tea yet.

DO buy a present. One that you’ve put some thought into. Cost is not important, but the thought behind the gesture is.

DON’T present her with a Tesco carrier bag with a bear in it, blatantly grabbed in a hurry, and with a rubbish apology about not having had time to write the card. You’ve known for a year that this day was coming around.

DO offer to run her a bath, make her tea and generally spoil her rotten.

DON’T tell her that she has stinky breath, if she hasn’t had time to clean her teeth yet, due to the above points. Not cool.

And a tip for the baby of the house… If daddy offers to change all the nappies for the day, but has failed to meet the above requirements….

DO Poo six times. Six stinky, sticky big poos for daddy.*

Cub, you made my Mother’s day with your stinky little bum! Thank you, and I love you lots! xxx

*Yep, he actually did poo six times. It was the day after his birthday party and he’d obviously been given little bits of party food from everyone, all day long. Bum activity has now returned to normal. Amazing comedy!


8 thoughts on “Dad’s Guide to Mother’s Day 2012

  1. I shall be printing this out and presenting it to my other half. At one point on Sunday I found myself doing DIY and looking after all 3 kids AND the dog at the same time. I know not what he was doing, but ‘not what he should have been’ springs to mind!

    • Oh rubbish! I’d have encouraged the kids and the dog to go and create some sort of havoc for the OH, just to teach him a lesson. But really, they do need it spelled out for them, don’t they !Lie in, breakfast, present, relaxing. One day. That’s all. Hmph.

  2. Why have I not found you before??? I love your blog and love Blog Gems for letting me get a chance to pop over and see you!

    And 6 poo’s? Wow, you had your hands full. Literally! 😉

  3. Excellent advice. If it wasn’t for the fact I don’t have a baby I’d swear you were in my house this Mothers’ Day! I had to tell hubby where he could get a small cheap box of choccies…. so making this the first year I got a pressie on Mother’s Day!

    xx Jazzy (via Blog Gems)

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